Uhmmm...

Ohkay, well I really don't have much to talk about in this post, nothing drastics been going on lately. I've been making progress on my road to a happier life. I've taken a real liking to Gossip Girl (currently via netflix then DVD until I catch up with where they are on actual TV). Other then that work and other  normalcy.

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Progess Report

So, due to bad habits of my past I seem to have some scarring and even more bad traits then I realized. The person I am right here, right now... is not healthy nor who I would like to be. But fixing myself, will be way easier said then done. I can admit that I'm taking things arbruptly, not really weening myself off but just taking charge of my own life cold turkey. Its the most frustrating thing I've ever done, being serious about change and not bullshitting around anymore. But I will succeed, for I am stronger then I honestly believe I am. And I do have faith in my self whether the rest of the world does or not.

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Le Difference

Have you ever encountered or endured something so powerful and so beautiful your whole life changes or at least just seems more clear?

Ever go through something or realize something that just overcomes you with so much more strength and a sense of reality?

I feel as if I've had so many "My life sucks/OH WOW, CLARITY AND CHANGE/nevermind not really" moments thats its becoming annoying and overly redundant.

Its a new year filled with so much opportunity. And please, I promise you that I'm not one of those cliche'd facebook statuses saying that all my problems and problem starters are going to be left behind in 2011. But I will say that 2011 had enough struggle and lessons learned to make me need to make 2012 completely different. Starting with a strong retaliation to my emotional disorders and dependencies. There are things that I feel I can clearly find fault in but continue to do... a friend has brought to my attention that some things have become addictions (Addiction; the state of being enslaved to a habit or practice of something that is psychologically or physically habit-forming). I'm become my own murderer, my own torturer, it has to stop before I literally destroy myself. I encourage everyone to take charge of your own lives not for others or for appearance matters, etc.... but for YOU.